Every occasion forced upon us by great meals in deals in Marks and Spencers and an array of overpriced cards in Hallmark, though designed to celebrate something special, leaves a trail of devastation in it’s wake.
The children who have lost their mothers endure Mothering Sunday. The lonely not eating around a big family table on Christmas day. Today is no exception. For those of us lucky enough to be part of a parenting team, regardless of the unique makeup of our family (step mum, foster mum, Dad and Daddy) today is another opportunity to show off about how lucky we are and how grateful we are for each other. Nothing wrong with that at all but today instead of gushing about how amazing my husband of eleven years today is I’m going to gush about something else.
If you are flying solo on the rollercoaster of mother or fatherhood, your feet dangling precariously close to the ground as you are flung from great heights at a million miles per hour, so much out of your control, today I salute you (and don’t you dare mistake that for pity – I think you are amazing.)
So don’t feel sad, or lonely or like the grass is greener on the other side. Remember that the Mums that haven’t had to walk a day in your shoes look at you in AWE and amazement and they are willing everything to work out for you.
Some of you are loving it and wouldn’t have it any other way, others are finding things a struggle and will be finding today particularly trying. Know that your time will come again and that for now your Valentine can be your children – they are the only ones that matter and the sacrifices you are making will mean you hold the most special place in their hearts.
I’ve put together a few reasons why single parents are just incredible….
- Your decisions are final. In your house, you rule and your children will benefit from the fact that they don’t get confused by mixed parenting messages and they won’t become manipulative by trying to play their parents off against one another.
- You are the world’s best role model for your children. You are showing them the importance of hard work and dedication to something more important than yourself and the end result will be a tight knit family and a child that respects it’s mother in adulthood.
- The buck stops with you and generally this means you are accountable, honest and dedicated group of people – no bullshit with a single parent. There’s no space to be anything but yourself.
- I think I’m good at spinning plates…. but you guys…. you really know how to do this shit. Time management, decision making, making the most from the least – you rock at this.
And sometimes…. just sometimes us hitched up Mamans are just a little bit jealous of the freedom that you have and in some cases (OBVIOUSLY NOT MINE) we are also jealous of the fact you don’t have in laws to contend with.
So today don’t waste a single second feeling sad that you don’t have a soppy card or an overpriced rose on your doorstep. You’ve got those small people as an absolute testament to what an incredible, worthy and loveable human being you are. Know that we coupled up Mums think you are an inspiration.
And your time will come again…….